Child’s Life Stage: Tween

Date with Dad

Did you know?

There are approximately 678 weeks from the time your daughter is born until she becomes a teen.

Fathers are the first role models of relationships, and also their daughter’s first love.

Celebrate a transitional milestone with your daughter

Dads play a special and significant role in their daughters’ lives, especially during her adolescent years. Therefore, every day and every week matters.

Fathers, how you choose to nurture your father-daughter relationship will impact the way she sees herself, and her outlook on future relationships. To support your daughter’s transitions to teen-hood confidently, your daughter needs your presence and affirmation.

Whether you are a Mum who desires to see your husband spend quality time with your daughter, or a Dad who wants to do something different for your father-daughter relationship, Date with Dad is a thoughtfully curated experience, just for you!

This year, we return with 4 seatings to choose from, and you may select the day and timeslot that best fits your schedules for this special date:

Sat, 26 Apr | 12.00pm – 2.30pm (Lunch) Fully booked
Sat, 26 Apr | 7.00 – 9.30pm (Dinner) Fully booked
Sun, 27 Apr | 12.00pm – 2.30pm (Lunch) Fully booked
Sun, 27 Apr | 7.00 – 9.30pm (Dinner) Fully booked

Invite your daughter on an unforgettable date!
1.
Engage in deeper sharing about growing up experiences and treasured values.
2.
Connect through interactive games and activities designed to spark conversations.
3.
Create memories through special rite-of-passage moments during the event.

Create a core memory together

For Dads and their daughter (11 years old and above)

For the past 14 years, Date with Dad has been one of Focus Singapore’s signature events, where fathers are given an opportunity to affirm and celebrate their teen daughter’s milestone and journey to becoming a confident young woman.

We are fully booked!

Early Bird rate (ends on 21 Mar 2025):
$185/father-daughter pair

Regular rate:
$220/father-daughter pair

Stay updated to be notified when a spot opens.

Join the Waitlist
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Supporting Partners

Frequently Asked Questions

Have questions? We’re here to help.

Date with Dad is a one-on-one event which allows you to establish that significant relationship with your daughter and give her your undivided attention.


If you have a younger daughter, you may wish to attend this event with her next year. 

Date with Dad is designed for dads to have deeper connections with daughters heading into their tweens and teenhood. 


You may wish to wait till your daughter is older so she will experience the full benefits of the programme.

The recommended maximum age for daughters is 16 years old as this event celebrates the important milestone of teen daughters becoming young women.

There are 4 seatings across 2 days to select from. Hence, it is a lunch or dinner affair for each father-daughter pair on either of the event dates. 


Father-daughter pairs may select the day and timeslot that best fits their schedules for this special date!

Research from Institute of Family Studies has shown that there is a unique bond between a father and his daughter — the father-daughter relationship greatly influences a girl’s developing self-image and approach to future romantic relationships.

Find a flat surface, place a ruler on your daughter's ring or middle finger and measure the width to determine the size of her ring.

 
 

There are 7 ring sizes, ranging from 1.60cm to 1.77cm, for you to choose from on the registration form. If the ring does not fit your daughter's finger, you will have the opportunity to do an exchange on the event day.

We encourage you to make all necessary arrangements to ensure that you and your daughter's schedules are clear for Date with Dad. There will be no refunds* for cancellations or no-shows.

Requests for transfer of registration will be accepted until 11 Apr 2025. Please email us at Chelsea.Cheng@family.org.sg.


*The Organiser reserves the rights to cancel or reschedule the event due to unforeseen circumstances. Every effort, however, will be made to inform participants as soon as possible of the change. For cancellation of event by the Organiser, fees will be refunded in full.

Conversation Starters for Healthy Sexuality

Talking about sex may seem awkward at first, but as you press on, it will begin to feel more natural.

Our effort to help our children develop a healthy understanding of love, relationships, and sex in marriage, is worthwhile.

As you take the first step towards a lifetime of healthy, wholesome relationships for your child, this eGuide will provide you with tools and tips to keep the conversations going! 

Suitable for parents with children aged 4 to 15 years.

Download PDF now (360.23 KB)

Conversations About Sex Need Not Be So Tough

Research shows that when parents engage their children in topics on sexuality, their children grow to make wiser choices in relationships and sex. To help you overcome your fears in broaching the topic, we have designed a Talk About Sex video series specially for parent and child (aged 7-12) to enjoy, engage with and learn together!
Find out more

Raising Resilient Kids

Building B.O.U.N.C.E for the bumps in life

Raising Resilient Kids

We live in an increasingly fast-paced and competitive society often described as a VUCA (Volatile, Uncertain, Complex, Ambiguous) world, where the pressure to succeed and perform can leave our children feeling panic-stricken and overwhelmed.

How can we nurture our child’s psychological resilience to better manage stress? Be empowered to emotionally coach your child towards a positive and healthy attitude for learning and living! 

Participants will be equipped with skills to:
1.
Understand your child’s world and potential stressors
2.
Process feelings in a healthy and productive manner
3.
Inculcate values and beliefs that will anchor your child in times of difficulty

Details

Duration: 1 – 1.5 hrs  

Delivery Format: Talks can be conducted either onsite or online via Zoom 

Enquiries:
Find out how you can encourage a growth mindset in your child!

Contact us

ParentEd is a parent education initiative from Focus on the Family Singapore.

The ParentEdTM Dialogues

Personalised parenting solutions for your unique child

The ParentEdTM Dialogues

Every child is unique, with their own personality – and there isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach to parenting. 

In the ParentEd Dialogues, parents will learn how to take a targeted and intentional approach when parenting each unique child. Each session is led by a Family Coach, who will help parents explore their current parenting challenges, introduce innovative approaches and provide useful feedback to develop real solutions and actions to bring about lasting change in the way you parent! 

Why the ParentEd Dialogues?
1.
Engage with a Family Coach who can guide you in optimising your parenting style
2.
Establish new friendships with like-minded parents in a safe community setting
3.
Equip yourself with fresh perspectives and practical tools to strengthen your parent-child relationship

These dialogue series cover foundational principles that are relevant across all age groups. They promise candid sharing and stimulating conversations among like-minded sojourners on the parenting journey. It’s a great place to acquire timeless principles, priceless perspectives and practical tools for informed, involved and intentional parenting! 

  • Dialogue 1 | The Parent Species: Becoming the parent we want to be 
  • Dialogue 2 | C.S.I – Child Species Investigation: Bringing out the best in your unique child 
  • Dialogue 3 | Creative Correction: Making discipline firm and friendly 
  • Dialogue 4 | High-5s at Home: Nurture the parent-child relationship 

Details

Duration: 4 x 2hr sessions 

Delivery Format: This workshop is to be conducted onsite with min. 10 pax & max. 20 pax.  

Have questions?
Find out how you can empower parent communities!

I'd like to find out more!

ParentEd is a parent education initiative from Focus on the Family Singapore.

SexEdTM Workshop

Cultivating secure identity, true intimacy & authentic relationships

SexEdTM Workshop

Today’s highly sexualised culture can overwhelm us with conflicting ideas about love, sex and relationships. Knowing the facts about love and God’s truth about sex empowers us to make healthy and beneficial life choices, so that we can enjoy His blessings of real love, true intimacy and genuine freedom. 

Explore together God’s design for human beings and relationships, as we talk about: 

  1. Sexual Identity: What determines my sex? How do I know my sexual orientation? What’s wrong with premarital sex? 

  2. Sexual Integrity: What is the purpose of sex? What does sexual wholeness mean to me? How important is sexual health and purity?  

  3. Sexual Intelligence: How do values and sexual consent affect decision making? How can I navigate love and relationships?  

  4. Sexual Issues: How do I make sense of the different sexual orientations and gender identities? How does masturbation, pornography or abortion affect me?  

  5. Sexual Discourse: How can I have a safe conversation about sexuality? What do I do when my sexual values differ from the crowd? 

Details

Duration: 2 hrs per module 

Delivery Format: This workshop is to be conducted onsite with min. 20 pax & max. 40 pax. 

Have more questions?
Our Outreach team is ready to answer any questions you may have! 

Find out more!

Interest List

Join the Interest List to be updated on our next run.

Interest List

ParentEd is a parent education initiative from Focus on the Family Singapore.

Raising Relationally-Smart Kids

Parental guidance to talk about sex

Raising Relationally-Smart Kids

Talking about sex can be one of the most daunting tasks for parents, especially if we never had the subject broached with us when growing up. How then can we confidently discuss healthy sexuality, love and relationships with our children?

Discover how you can help your child make wise decisions about their health, relationships, and life!

Participants will be equipped with skills to:
1.
Engage your children in open and honest conversations about sex and relationship
2.
Tackle growing online risks such as pornography and inappropriate content
3.
Empower your children on setting healthy boundaries with their peers

Details

Duration: 1 – 1.5 hrs 

Delivery Format:
Talks can be conducted either onsite or online via Zoom 

Have questions?
Reach out to find out more about this webinar! 

I'm keen to find out more!

Join the Interest List

Registration for this webinar has closed. Please join the Interest List for 2024.

Interest List

ParentEd is a parent education initiative from Focus on the Family Singapore.

Raising Screenwise Kids

Empowering kids to navigate the virtual world

Raising Screenwise Kids

With so much of our children’s time now spent online, how can we raise them to be screenwise and future-ready?

It can be a parent’s greatest challenge to set limits on screentime and boundaries around digital content consumption. Yet if done right, our children can be empowered to consume media wisely.

This webinar is all about creating a healthy, balanced relationship with technology that goes beyond mere rules and restrictions.

Participants will be equipped with skills to:
1.
Establish positive digital habits as a family and enjoy meaningful offline experiences
2.
Set clear and safe boundaries for screen time and online interactions
3.
Navigate tensions and disagreement about screentime

* Available Funding:
This topic is available for funding under the collaboration with Infocomm Media Development Authority (IMDA) Digital for Life Fund*. 

To be eligible for the subsided programme fee, the following requirements are to be met:  

  • Minimum requirement of 20 parents in attendance on actual day.  
  • Minimum requirement of at least 75% of participants to submit programme feedback form after attending the session 

Details

Duration: 1 – 1.5 hrs 

Delivery Format:
Talks can be conducted either onsite or online via Zoom 

Have more questions?
Reach out to find out how you can bring this programme to your workplace or community!

Register your interest

ParentEd is a parent education initiative from Focus on the Family Singapore.

Register Your Interest

Playing to My Strengths As A Father

In today’s world, fathers are increasingly expected to play equal roles with mothers in terms of hands-on care. However, many of us grew up in an age where fathers played more traditional roles, leaving childcare mostly to the mothers. Lacking in role models from their own lives, some fathers may find it intimidating to bond with or care for their little ones, or even struggle to juggle both traditional and modern expectations of fathers.  

As a father to two young children, I too have felt inadequate. I often compared myself with mummy, who seems to tackle modern motherhood effortlessly, whether it was bringing home the bacon, cooking, cleaning, or caring for the children. Her list seems infinitely longer than mine! 

Though self-doubt continues to be a struggle, I have come a long way in building my confidence as a father. A time of personal reflection, as well as regular affirmation from my wife, has led me to realise that as a father, I play a unique and irreplaceable role in the family.  

Here are some ways I have learnt to step up in my role as a father.   

“Parents each have unique interests and personalities that can contributed to enriching our children’s development.“

1. Leverage one’s unique personality and interests  

While it is good for parents to recognise our weaknesses and build on them, it should not blind us to our existing strengths. My wife and I have unique interests and personalities that have contributed to enriching our children’s development.  

In terms of interests, my wife exposes the children to arts and crafts, cooking, and applies her experiences as an educator to help them learn subjects such as English. As for myself, I bring my sense of humour and creativity to playtime and storytelling, expose my children to mechanical and open-ended styles of play through toys such as Lego and Transformers, and introduce them to other interests like coffee-making. 

Personality-wise, my wife brings more energy and spontaneity, and a sense of adventure to our outings together while I bring a tender love and warmth to our relationships, which creates an atmosphere of safety and acceptance in the home.  

“Avoid unhealthy comparisons with other parents, and zero in on each other’s strengths and contributions to the family.“

2. Recognise that we contribute to the family differently

It is human nature to compare ourselves to others, especially in terms of performance and ability. While this can sometimes serve as a benchmark for growth, such comparisons can become toxic when we cling too tightly to unrealistic standards.  

Rather than compete on who is the “better” parent at home, it has been helpful for my wife and I to take time to reflect and affirm each other – and ourselves! – on the different ways we contribute to the family.  

For instance, my wife is better able to juggle the many tasks at home, spanning from household chores to caring for the kids. She is more natural at keeping the house looking fresh and homely, in part by keeping a lookout for good deals on household items. As an educator by profession, she keeps a better pulse on our children’s learning needs and school schedules. Finally, as the more adventurous parent, she keeps abreast of events and activities that the family can enjoy. 

On the other hand, I am better at managing conflicts and meltdowns at home, whether it was between my wife and I or with the children. I am also good at giving the children undivided attention and tuning in to their interests and thoughts, which helps boost their confidence and self-esteem. Finally, I feel better able at guiding the family on making bigger decisions, such as career choices, choosing where to stay, which school our children should go, managing finances and big-ticket expenditures.  

 

3. Surround yourself with resources and like-minded persons  

Nobody wakes up as a competent parent from day one. Many skills that experienced parents demonstrate today are hard-won from experience or passed down from other parents. Similarly, I had to educate myself in the areas where I lacked. One key way was to leverage modern technologies to accommodate my busy lifestyle. For example, I follow parenting accounts on social media for bite-sized tips and tools which I can absorb on-the-go. 

It is also important to get connected to gain support and learn from others. For example, we got connected with fellow parents of younger children and have regular get-togethers. This exposes us to various styles of parenting, while simultaneously helping us and our children to build lasting friendships. We are also members of online parenting groups where we regularly get advice from on a wide variety of parenting issues.  

“Papa’s home!!”
Every day when I come home, my children shout for joy and run towards me for a giant bear hug. 

This image of my children welcoming me home is seared in my mind and heart. It keeps me going as a father. I once thought that my role as a father was easily replaceable, but this could not be further from the truth; there is no replacement for the role that we play in our family.

To my fellow fathers, if you are struggling with self-doubt over your ability as a father, take heart: At the end of the day, our children do not want a different father, or a “better” father to be at the door. All they want is for their very own Papa to return home to them.

© 2023 Focus on the Family Singapore. All rights reserved.

Mum, Here are 5 Signs You’re Being Too Hard On Yourself

We recently passed the halfway mark in 2023. Some people like to do a mid-term life review to ensure they are on track with their goals. Educational institutions have assessments or exams to evaluate their students’ learning.

Have you done a mid-year assessment of your role as a mother?

This may sound like a strange question to ask mothers, but if we care to admit, we are evaluating our “performance” more often than we realise. And the bad news is our self-assessment is often biased because as mums, we are our own harshest critics.

Here are five signs that we are too hard on ourselves.

1. We engage in unhealthy comparison  

Comparison is a killjoy in parenting. Knowingly or unconsciously, we compare ourselves with other parents – in the areas of academic performance or in aspects that we or our children are weak in. Does the following inner dialogue sound familiar?

“Why can’t I be like Macy, she is so adept at juggling work and family life…she just got promoted and her children are doing so well in school. What’s wrong with me?”

2. We overlook the “little wins” in parenting 

There is a good mix of bad days and good days for mothers. However, when we are hard on ourselves, we are less inclined to notice the significant moments. When our child shows kindness to a sibling, we take it for granted; when junior puts in the effort to study for exams, we are slow to affirm; instead, we emphasise to junior how much more can be done to do well.  

3. We blame ourselves when things go south  

There is a good mix of bad days and good days for mothers. However, when we are hard on ourselves, we are less inclined to notice the significant moments. When our child shows kindness to a sibling, we take it for granted; when junior puts in the effort to study for exams, we are slow to affirm; instead, we emphasise to junior how much more can be done to do well.  

4. We frequently use negative language

Whether it is expressed verbally or an inner conversation, we are inclined towards negative self-talk. 

“I am not good enough”, “I just can’t get everything right”, “I should have known better than to….”, “I am a bad mother.”

If any of these critical statements ring a bell, you are not alone. However, being overly critical of oneself can be unproductive and ineffective. It does not benefit anyone, much less our children, even if we are hard on ourselves and push ourselves to do better or to make our child behave.  

5. We put self-care on the back burner

Our children’s needs often take centre stage and we are so focused on meeting their needs that we forget to care for ourselves properly. Truth is, we can provide the best care for our children when we first care for ourselves. Prioritising ourselves can make us more effective in our parenting and ultimately, happier as individuals. 

One effective antidote to combat such self-defeating thoughts is self-compassion. So, what can we do to develop the art of self-compassion? 

1. Embrace unconditional positive regard  

Carl Rogers, a humanistic psychologist introduced the concept of unconditional positive regard as a key component in his person-centred approach to therapy. It involves showing care and prizing a person by unconditionally accepting whatever the person does or is feeling.  

While unconditional positive regard is often associated with counselling, it can also be applied in other relationship contexts (e.g., parent-child, husband-wife).  

We can apply unconditional positive regard to ourselves as mums too – accepting and valuing ourselves regardless of circumstances we face in our parenting.  

2. Learn to silence the inner critic  

    • Find the belief statements to set off the negativity
      For example, it could be: “What’s wrong with me; I can’t get anything right as a mother.” 
    • Fix the critical script by challenging it 
      Is it really true that you cannot get anything right? Even if you made many mistakes in parenting, there are instances where you have gotten things right. Recall those positive incidents instead of focusing on that one poor judgment call. 
    • Flip the self-defeating thought to a healthy or empowering belief 
      For example, replace the negative statement with, “It is not true that I can’t get anything right as a mother. There are instances where I did the right thing. I wish I had made a better choice in this matter, but I can learn from it and exercise better judgment next time.”

      Silencing the inner critic takes time, patience, and practice. Do not lose heart if you do not get it right in the initial stage of practising this technique. Keep at it and you will experience a positive mindset change.  

3. Prioritise your self-care

One of the best gifts we can give our children is a healthy and happy mother. So, make time to nurture ourselves through activities that strengthen the body, mind and spirit. 

Parenting is hard work. While it is beneficial to reflect on our actions or take stock of ourselves to learn and grow, as mums, we often take ourselves too seriously and judge ourselves more harshly than we deserve.  

Let’s learn to value and accept ourselves unreservedly and develop the skill of silencing our inner critic. What is one thing you will do today to be kind to yourself?  

© 2023 Focus on the Family Singapore. All rights reserved. 

Growing Trust Through the Teenage Years

How do we build trust in our relationships with our children? How do you keeping trusting your kids after they’ve messed up? Is fear motivating you to control your kids’ behaviour? 

As our children grow older and forge their identities through independence, it can be hard to keep the bond of trust. Yet we have to keep trying because trust in a relationship is what provides safety and respect.  

Mother-daughter duo Jenni Ho-Huan and Abby share with us their stories and tips on how to cement their bond of trust.  

Explain the ‘why’ behind the ‘what’ 

Time is needed to build trust. Abby, who’s in her third year of university, said that she learnt to keep trusting her parents through the repeated conversations they’ve had over the years. 
 
“For example, when we were younger and Mum wanted us to do something like our 10pm curfew and I was like, ‘oh, my friends’ curfew is 11pm’, but Mum always explained why. It was never like ‘because I said so’ but they explained the why behind the what.” 
 
The way her parents separated the issue from the person also helped Abby learn that being corrected does not mean her parents think badly of her as a person but instead, they were merely correcting the behaviour.  
 
So, when trust is broken because of certain wrong actions, consequences are given through lots of thoughtful communication. 
 
“So it’s not that you inherently are a bad child,” said the eldest child.  
 
Jenni tries to have pockets of time daily to think through what she wants to say to her child and how to say it. 
 
Pulling back and processing has helped her approach conversations clearly and intentionally so that it goes “better than me saying 10,000 things and none of them makes sense.”

Apologise when we get it wrong

Parents can also default to the mode of “we know better”. However, as our kids grow into teens, we have to help them grow by actually listening to them, giving weight to their opinions and apologising when we get it wrong.  
 
Abby learnt how to apologise by watching her parents do so. She recalled, “Being willing to apologise is a big deal. One of my memories is when my dad got upset and I think he raised his voice and maybe I looked scared so he came to my room, apologised and explained why he got upset and how he felt. That set an example for me to own my mistakes.” 
 
Learning to listen well also helps avoid incidents like this. As Abby shared, “[My parents’ willingness to listen] lets us have a space to share our own lives and it encourages us to share the things we are processing, our hopes and fears so that creates emotional intimacy. So even when it gets hard, there’s emotional reserves, and when conflict occurs or when push comes to shove, you still know your parents love you.” 

Keep up the ‘communication habit’

According to Jenni, developing the “communication habit” to stay in connection with one another is critical. 

“When the kids were small, there may be times when we have to intrude into their space and they may get irritated but you have to trust that your love is getting to them somehow. You have to make sure you get into the fray or you go back to the room to say I am sorry,” said Jenni.  
 
She explained that it has to be a connection of the heart so that even as a child, they know we have their backs and are more open to communicate.   
 
Jenni likens every year of parenting to be like reaching another “clearing in a forest” where you never been before, and it brings new things to talk about. So the intentional reaching out to connect has to be done constantly. 
 
The mother of three, who’s also the author of a kids book named “Simple Tips for Happy Kids,” also consciously works on growing her own self-awareness and gaining clarity on what’s important.   
 
“I have to be clear on what is important to me as a parent, what are my non-negotiables, realising my non-negotiables has to take into consideration that I am raising a child in a different generation, different context,” she explained.  

Being aware of the different world our kids are growing up in will help us grow as parents while also communicating to our kids that we understand their world. 

Develop situational awareness

Being aware of the different world our kids are growing up in will help us grow as parents while also communicating to our kids that we understand their world.  
 
“These days, 10-year-old kids know about the war in Ukraine… last time, when we were 10, we were ‘blur blur’ but they have all these information to navigate and I think it can create this fog that makes it harder to connect. Sometimes it’s not that your child doesn’t trust you, but their world is a different world.” 
 
Jenni advises that we continue pursuing their hearts even if they don’t seem receptive at first. We also have to be aware of our own fears and motivation.  

We are capable of repairing our narratives so we can offer something more stable and hopeful for our family.

“All parents have irrational fears… we can imagine that one bad habit they are doing now is going to mark their lives.” 
 
Jenni shared that these fears can propel us to be anxious, something she experienced herself with her son who did not thrive in the mainstream school system. 
 
“The turning point for me was when I realised I was trying to over-plan his life too much. But my role is not to ensure his journey has no road bumps.” 
 
So part of the journey of building trust with our kids is not letting our emotions push us to control their behaviour or the outcomes of their decision. As we grow as parents and put in the hard yards to communicate and connect in season and out of season, we can one day see the fruit of that bond of trust.  
 
And even if you didn’t grow up with that yourself, be encouraged that you can still break the cycle to start a new story for your family.  
 
As Jenni so wisely said, “We are capable of repairing our narratives so we can offer something more stable and hopeful for our family.” 

© 2023 Focus on the Family Singapore. All rights reserved.