Published on 11 March, 2025
When she’s not hiding out at a café or having funny little conversations with her three children, June can be found editing articles or dreaming up podcast episodes for Focus on the Family Singapore.
Discussing sex with your child can feel awkward and daunting, but it’s an essential part of their development. We recommend approaching the topic early, when your child is around the age of four or five, as we set the tone by being their first source of information in this important area of life. Â
Furthermore, by starting young, our kids generally don’t feel as awkward about the topic, as they would be more curious and open to listening to what you have to say. Broaching the subject in teenhood is another matter altogether, as the teen awkwardness would have usually started, and they may have already heard things from their friends. Â
By applying openness and honesty, you can help your child understand their bodies, relationships, and boundaries that can help keep them safe. Â
Here’s a guide to help you navigate these conversations with ease.Â
Laying the Foundation
At this age, children are naturally curious about their bodies and the differences between boys and girls. Use simple, accurate language to answer their questions. Â
For example, if your child asks where babies come from, you can say, “Babies grow in a special place inside their mommy’s tummy called the uterus.” Or they may ask: “Why are boys and girls’ bodies different?Â
Emphasise the importance of privacy and having safe boundaries for themselves. For example, what is good versus bad touch? This will help us set up safeguards against sexual abuse.Â
Building on BasicsÂ
As children grow, their questions may become more detailed. Continue to provide accurate information and encourage open communication. You can introduce the concept of puberty and explain that their bodies will go through changes as they grow older. For example, you might say, “During puberty, your body will start to change, and you’ll notice things like hair growing in new places and your voice getting deeper.”Â
Check out our Talk About Sex video on What is Puberty? It’s designed for parent-and-child to view together. Â
Preparing for Puberty
By this age, children are likely to have heard some information about sex from friends, media, or school. It’s crucial to provide them with accurate information and address any misconceptions. Start by discussing what makes a healthy relationship, and what red flags to watch out for. Â
Also, help your tween understand why porn is unhealthy for them, and why it can be so addictive.Â
General Tips for All AgesÂ
Remember, talking to our children about sex is an ongoing conversation. Starting young helps us lay a good foundation for more conversations and trickier topics. Â
By being open, honest, and supportive, we are their best guides to help them navigate this area of their development with confidence.Â
When she’s not hiding out at a café or having funny little conversations with her three children, June can be found editing articles or dreaming up podcast episodes for Focus on the Family Singapore.
