调查:与冠病疫情相比 孩童更担心考试与成绩 (Children More Worried About Grades and Exams than COVID-19)

十分访谈:青少年霸凌问题 (The Issue of Youth Bullying)

《狮城有约》Hello Singapore
Republished with Permission
18 March 2021

其实这个霸凌的事件呢, 看的满多。霸凌图片大家都已经知道了,可是因为现在有通过这个网络媒体呢,很多时候我们看到这个霸凌状况,许多人就因为,拍在手机,然后上传。上传的原因呢?有许多当然就是要嘲笑戏弄对方。很多时候呢,就会觉得说没什么意思呢,也会觉得说因为,自己很有这个权利吗?可是往往也就没有想到,这个网络的传播力还有这个破坏的能力。


啊,其实很多时候在我看到的案例当中呢,呃,都是因为要呃欺负对方. 呃,很多时候就是要觉得很好玩, 呃觉得很好笑,然后就传出去,然后就觉得说,诶,上上媒体让我周围的朋友看了一下,我觉得我很有这个呃,霸气十足嘛,我很有威力. 可是真的往往没有想到呢。呃,发出去之后呢,不但只有朋友看到,还有媒体呀,新闻,各个角落,全世界人都看得到,那反过来,凡咬他们一口,嗯。

其实我的看法呢?就是这个呃,就是纪律上的这个处罚还是必要的,因为毕竟是做错了事,所以还是要有这个后果是得到惩罚的。那我觉得惩罚当中呢?也就是官方方面传达的一个讯息就是让大家知道说:"诶,这种行为是不对的。"  那我们从学校或者稍微群体也不纵容这样的,这个行为,所以,毕竟还是需要。。。甚至,我们看到最近的案例呢,有一种好像是杀一儆百的这个感觉,所以当然不要单单只是,就是说,纪律上的处罚,还是要配和双管齐下进行一些辅导的帮助啊帮助这个受害者,帮助这个霸凌, 帮助霸凌的家人也是很重要的

其实我看到这些旁观者呢,我真的觉得很很很伤心、很揪心,也是因为我在跟这些青少年的工作当中才能听到他们说: “诶,为什么他们袖手旁观不介入呢?“

很多时候都是因为很害怕害怕,就是说如果他去介入去帮助的话呢?那个霸凌或者是那个霸凌的群体呢, 会找上门来哦,所以还是自己保护自己比较重要, 那,这这把霸凌也真的是一个风气,一个文化的一个问题,需要时间来改变。不过如果我们不,就是把这个恶循呢,打破掉呢,打断掉呢?那就一直会持续下去。所以我们在这青少年的工作当中呢,鼓励就是他们看到朋友就是如果受到这个霸凌的影响。 就要直接去帮助他们,或者就是停止那个,叫那个恶霸把停手哦,所以呢但是可以帮助慢慢的调整对整个风气的这个文化可以踏出这个恶群。


[Family life educator Chong Ee Jay]
Bullying is actually very common, everyone knows about it. However nowadays, a lot of people take videos and share them on social media, which is why we see more of it.

Why do people share such videos? Well, there are many reasons for it, one of it is to make fun of the other party. Many times, it seems harmless to share it. Sometimes, it is the sense of power over someone else. Of course the destructive effect of such a video going viral may also be downplayed.

I had a similar case previously, the youth went on social media and didn’t imagine that the situation would affect so many people. In the end, the whole family was implicated and received a lot of backlash from the public.

In a lot of the cases I see, it's all about bullying the other person. Most of the time, they deem it to be very fun, or amusing, so they think that uploading it for friends to watch will add to their street cred. But they often forget that after uploading it, not only will their friends see it, but the media, the news, people from all over the world will see it too. And this video will come back to bite them.

I believe that this punishment is still necessary, as, at the end of the day, an offence was committed. There needs to be a suitable consequence. How about the course of discipline? On a corporate level, it must be conveyed that this behaviour is not acceptable. As a school, or a group, we will not condone this too... Even as we look at other recent incidents, there is some understanding that disciplining one warns a hundred. So it's not just about the punishment, we must also have a two-pronged approach to counsel the victim, the bully and the bully's family too.

When I see these bystanders, it really breaks my heart and causes anxiety. I get to hear from the youth in my work, and they ask why their friends didn't step in to help. Many times, it's really the fear of what happens if they intervene to stop the fight. Would the bully or the group of friends come to make more trouble for those who step up? It seems better to protect yourself than get involved.

Bullying is also kind of an attitude, like a cultural issue, and that needs time to change. At the same time, if we don't stop the vicious cycle, it will continue. So in our work with youth, we encourage them to immediately step up and help their friends when they see others being influenced by a bully or even being bullied, it can make little but significant adjustments to an attitude, a culture, and step out of the circle of bad influence.


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