Rediscovering My Rhythm and How to Be the Mum My Children Need

Rediscovering My Rhythm and How to be The Mum My Children Need in This Season

Lina Ng's open letter to mums this Mother's Day

By Focus on the Family Singapore | 12 May 2020

As part of our annual Mother’s Day campaign, Take A Moment seeks to encourage mothers to embrace their strengths and weaknesses, instead of striving for perfection in her many facets of life. Read the stories of these everyday mums - their struggles and joys - offering encouragement and hope for whatever situation you're going through today.

Lina Ng, MediaCorp Artiste, Mum of 3 boys

Having three kids, I’ve been 'staying-home' for a long time.

When Circuit Breaker (CB) hit, we immediately arranged for family meetings to discuss how daily life would look like and adjusted the boys’ schedules for home-based learning (HBL). Apart from a little bargaining, they’ve been accountable to us about their time spent (including time for computer games) and usually sleep well! I believed that what made it easier was because of the time I had with them when they were younger; it seems like many habits we cultivated are showing up nicely now.

Separately, while I thought I’ve gotten good at planning and handling the pressure of keeping the home together, focusing on myself and adjusting to change can sometimes be challenging.

I also took this opportunity to fulfill the promises I made to my boys in the past.

I’m not very IT-savvy but with CB, it’s so funny how I’m now forced to face it! On the work end, I’ve been asked to create social media posts, and at home, I’ve had to help my youngest boy upload his homework. I’ve actually just discovered how to scan with a phone!

I also find myself struggling to protect time for self-care. I’ve been telling myself that HBL time means down-time for myself, but often at the start of the day, I’d start cleaning my home and get carried away. Before I know it, it’s time to prepare lunch. So now, I tell myself - no chores! Even if I am itching to do something!

What I found to have helped me most is to take a moment to start my day with bible reading and prayer. Everytime I ‘force’ myself to take a break, I recharge even faster and get more done even with less time.

This really got me thinking about my priorities. Do I really need to finish folding that set of clothes right now? Do I really find joy in what I am doing, or am I overtiring myself? As I reflected, I found that this is truly a time to enjoy the moment with family. Other than having meals together, we bond over one thing we all love – watching movies and the online musicals that are now free online! I also took this opportunity to fulfill the promises I made to my boys in the past, like teaching them to cook and bake.

If not for the breathing space we have now because of CB, I wouldn’t know when I would have made good my promises. I’m learning that our children value our words greatly and I mustn’t say something and take it lightly. I also have to be realistic about my capacity to juggle work and family. So now, I tell my children this, “I want to be a woman of my word. Sometimes, when Mummy makes a promise and it hasn’t been fulfilled, give me time.”

© 2020 Focus on the Family Singapore. All rights reserved.


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