A Letter to My 15-Year-Old Self

If I could go back half a lifetime ago (ok, slightly more than that), here's what I would tell my teenage self.

By Judith Xavier
5 July, 2016

Dear Awkward and Angsty 15-year-old Self,

Right now, you are in a pretty amazing place in your life, although you don't think so. While it feels like you are battling daily with your parents, teachers and there seems to be a constant spotlight on your inadequacies, you are growing as a person - there is resilience and strength building up in you, even though you do not know it yet.

Some of the traits that you consider personal weaknesses will turn out to be your greatest strengths. You will continue to be that person who always questions the status quo, but that will lead you to make choices that will ultimately give you a lot of personal satisfaction (You will be a stay-at-home homeschooling mum. Really. Also, your secondary school English teacher is absolutely right; language and communicating is your strength and you will turn this into a viable career. Don't worry too much about your sub-par grades in math, even when you fail. It actually matters more that you keep trying at it, though it doesn't come naturally to you. That perseverance will see you through far more challenging situations as an adult. You are enough, just as you are. Don't drown in your own negativity.

By the way, your parents do not hate you or see you as a disappointment (surprise!). And just after you have kids (two boys!), the extent of their love and sacrifice will really sink in for you, and you will love and respect them even more for it. You will be good friends, and your father will be your sons' hero, just as he is yours.

A quick word on marriage (although I know the thought has not crossed your mind). You are going to marry an amazing man - your best friend. He is as flawed as you, but loves you more than your 15-year-old self believes you deserve. He understands you some of the time, and prays through the times he doesn't. Hang in there, and do not sell yourself short. He's worth the wait.

Adulthood is not all sweetness and light, but you will embrace and enjoy it. Keep growing and learning, it's going to be fine.

Copyright © 2016. Focus on the Family Singapore Ltd.


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